Peter Rhodes: The end of the road for April fools?

Consider the way people choose which football team to support. Do they sit down quietly, analyse the history, techniques and mission-statement of each team and make an informed decision? Of course not. People choose teams in the same way that chickens choose their mothers, by imprinting on the first thing they see as they hatch from the egg. From the moment a toddler is given his first Villa, Arsenal or Man Utd T-shirt, there is no turning. The same goes for political parties. Changing a Labour voter into a Tory voter is as hard as persuading a Liverpool fan to support Everton. Politicians like to pretend there are millions of undecided voters out there, to be persuaded by brilliant argument and dazzling rhetoric, but the reality is that the May 7 General Election is already decided.

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I admit it. I was taken in by Radio 4's April the First spoof about changing the size of the goalmouth to make football more interesting. In my defence, it sounded entirely plausible, given that in 200 years of kicking balls around, neither the FA nor anyone else has yet decided on a standard-sized pitch. As one soccer website explains it for the benefit of our US cousins: "That's right, American football fans, the size of the pitch can vary. Get used to it."

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In fact, have April the First stunts had their day? In this internet age, millions of folk have smartphone access to bizarre reports from all over the world. There are people who genuinely believe the biggest news stories of the day are flying saucers over Rio, a TV presenter's dress coming undone and a koala bear with two heads. In this busy, wacky world where so many daft, improbable things happen and we believe everything, what's so clever about spoofing people, say, with a report that spaghetti is harvested from trees in Italy?

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Thanks for your comments on the alleged perks of working in charity shops. One veteran recalls: "Some people use charity shops because it's nearer than the local tip without the queues and you can dump whatever you want, day or night, at the back door. Sorters have first dibs; just ask the manageress what price it's to be sold at and offer a bit less. Some sorters come with a shopping list from friends and family and everyone is asked to look out for, for example, a size 16 blouse for a wedding or a 34-inch pair of Levi jeans."

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As for rumours of thieves targeting charity shops, one reader recalls the joys of running jumble sales: "We were charging only a few pence for clothing. A decent coat would be only 50p. We had thieves at these sales. I could not believe my eyes when I saw a woman dragging clothes off a table and putting them in a carrier bag."

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But at least there is some good in the world, as seen in the shining eyes of a teenage girl introduced during one of the interminable high-street TV election interviews (only another 31 days to go, folks). What did she want the politicians to do? "Get to grip with climate change," she enthused. Okay kids, let's start right now. No central heating between February and November. No hot showers lasting more than five minutes. Clothes to be repaired, not replaced. Minimum driving-licence age raised to 25. The reason politicians don't get to grip with climate change is because it would be horrendously unpopular. Especially among the cosseted young.