Irish actress Jessie Buckley reveals battle with eating disorder and depression
The 36-year-old is up for best actress at the Academy Awards for her performance in Hamnet.
Irish actress Jessie Buckley has revealed she went through a battle with an eating disorder and depression during her teenage years.
The 36-year-old from Killarney, County Kerry, credited a love of music and theatre for helping her with her recovery, but did not specify which eating disorder she had.
She told Lauren Laverne on BBC Radio 4’s Desert Island Discs: “I had an eating disorder, and it took time, and it took a lot of help, and also it was depression…
“I didn’t know how to be alive the way I wanted to be, and it was difficult, but I do not for a second regret it, and I think I’ve been able to transform it and recognise our vulnerabilities as humans in the world.
“You know, you can’t walk through life not being affected, but you can transform that into something that allows you to be more human and alive in the way that you want to be.
“And I’m very grateful for everybody who helped me along the way with that, and for the people who held space for that…
“I’ve been in therapy since I was 17, I still go every week.”
Buckley has recently received a string of awards for her performance as William Shakespeare’s wife Agnes Hathaway, historically known as Anne, in the film adaptation of Maggie O’Farrell’s novel Hamnet.
The actress also said she realised acting was “essential” for her wellbeing and “like water to me” after her appendix “almost burst” during one of her earliest performances and she refused to leave until the play was finished, when she was then taken to hospital.
She continued: “When I moved to London, I still wasn’t out of the woods.
“I think there were moments where I was like, ‘if I don’t get better here, this music, this being part of theatre – I’m not going to be able to do this any more, and I probably won’t survive’.
“And that was the thing that turned it in my head, I was like, ‘I don’t want to sacrifice that, this is bigger than that’, and won.”
Buckley also recounted her time on BBC talent show I’d Do Anything, which was about the search for an actress to play Nancy in a West End production of Oliver!, and which catapulted her to fame.
In an interview with British Vogue in January, she spoke about being criticised for her appearance during her time on the show.
Speaking to Laverne, Buckley said: “I don’t like that part of it.
“I think that was a young woman who’s trying to discover her body and herself, like we all do. And I wish that hadn’t happened.
“I think I was putting a brave face on, because really what I wanted to do was sing and I wanted to act, and I wanted to be part of this industry, and all of a sudden you had to be a certain kind of person.
“And I just wasn’t, I never will be. That’s just not me.”
Buckley added: “I’m so proud of that girl. I think she did great and I don’t regret any of it.”
She also spoke about her “extraordinary” mother, and said: “My parents are no longer together, and she lives in Dublin, and she’s writing her own story right now at 60 years of age, and I’m so proud of her.”
She sounded emotional as she gave her first song choice, which was a rendition of her mother, Marina, singing O Holy Night in church.
Listen to the full Desert Island Disc episode on BBC Sounds and BBC Radio 4 from Sunday at 10am.
