Shropshire Star

Peter Rhodes on a deadly diet, a postponed passport and the dithering saga of anointing a King

To recap the latest health news: 1) obesity can lead to dementia, 2) some high-street coffee is rammed with caffeine and 3) half of the foods we eat can cause cancer. It has always been a puzzle that the English language has nothing equivalent to the French “Bon appetit.” Suddenly, it makes sense.

King Charles III. Photo: Victoria Jones/PA Wire

I sent my online passport renewal and took the old one to the Post Office where they tell me applications are taking anything up to six weeks, although it may be quicker. It is a long and fairly complicated process.

And yet in Happy Valley (BBC1), the drug-addled gang not only had a passport sorted for the jailbird Tommy Lee Royce (James Norton), who had never been abroad before, but also for his teenage son Ryan (Rhys Connah). And that's before Tommy had even escaped from court.

The most sacred moment in the Coronation of HM King Charles III will be his anointing with holy oil. It has always been a secret moment and, true to tradition, a privacy canopy has been prepared. But this time there will be a see-through panel so that you and I and the world, will be able to witness the magic. Why the window? Why not simply scrap the screen? Because Charles has yet to decide whether or not he wants the anointing to be seen. This is a bit worrying. Charles has had 74 years to make this decision yet with a few weeks to go, he's still faffing about. Hail, King Charles the Indecisive.

Levi Strauss are celebrating the 150th anniversary of their classic 501 jeans. I won't be joining in. As a penniless lad, I dreamed for years of possessing a pair of 501s. When I could finally afford them, the fit was great and the button fly stylish. But while most of the fabric was hard-wearing, the knees wore through in no time, and this was before ripped jeans became fashionable. After that I stuck to Wranglers.

Anyway, after a certain age, few blokes look good in any sort of jeans. That's the time to switch to work trousers or cargoes which are less than half the price of Levi's and have so many pockets that you can entertain yourself for hours searching for your bus pass.