Peter Rhodes on a pale performer, a cross-dressing politician and how the BBC keeps you uninformed

By Peter Rhodes | Peter Rhodes | Published:

Auntie Beeb - the unreliable relative.

Pale - Dita Von Teese

I REFERRED yesterday to Alan Sugar re-tweeting a spoof image of Jeremy Corbyn in a car with Adolf Hitler. If you rely on the BBC for your news, you won't have a clue what I was on about. While ITN and Sky News and all the major newspapers published the image on their website, Auntie Beeb decided you should not be allowed to see it.

WAS anyone else reminded of the Beeb's news blackout in February when for several days it simply ignored the global coverage of Corbyn's alleged meeting with a Czech spy? Does the BBC have a "Protect Jeremy" department? The sad fact these days is that if you rely on Auntie to keep you informed, you won't be very well informed.

DITA Von Teese, the doyenne of burlesque performers, has marked her 45th birthday by revealing to the Guardian how hard it is to keep her much-scrutinised skin so pale, living in sunny Los Angeles. A reader responded thus: "Seems like a nice lass. If she really wants to stay pale she should come live with me in east Manchester."

AND talking of dressing up. There is a certain irony in Eddie Izzard being appointed to Labour's national executive as a direct result of the anti-semitism row. While right-on liberals admire Izzard's endless charity work and unwavering commitment to the EU, and smile indulgently at his fondness for frocks and lipstick, did anyone think to ask conservative Jews and Muslims what their religions say about cross-dressing? Thought not.

ONE of the things the ever-whingeing millennial generation fails to grasp is how hard-up we babyboomers were in years gone by. Everything you needed in life, from food and clothes to washing machines and lawnmowers, was cripplingly expensive. We simply did not possess the quantity or quality of things that people take for granted today. Which is why the final scene in Saturday's revived Generation Game (BBC) was a pale imitation of the 1970s original. Back then, people really wanted those prizes. Today, as the contestants acquired their items, you couldn't help feeling that the canteen of cutlery (who sits down for dinner any more?) would go straight in the attic and the telescope would be sold on eBay. In a world glutted with consumer goods, who cares about an extra toaster?

BRING back the Saturday jobs. The Work and Pensions Secretary Esther McVey says weekend and after-school jobs help prepare kids for the world of employment and teach them all sorts of "soft skills". Damn right. In my teens I was a butcher's boy. It taught me that the richest people give the smallest tips and the poorest people the biggest. It also taught me diplomacy. For example, when you are soaked to the skin and utterly knackered from an endless delivery round, what is the correct thing to say to a very posh lady who examines her Christmas-dinner order on the doorstep and wails as you wheel your bike away: "Hang on. I want stuffing!" Answer: you bite your lip and say absolutely nothing.

Peter Rhodes

By Peter Rhodes

Award-winning columnist and blogger. Keeping an eye on the tribulations and trivia of a fast-changing world


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