Shropshire Star

Stick diet, I prefer to die happy!

I'm a mug aren't I? I fall for every con in the book. My doctor suggested that I should try healthy eating. And I fell for it! I went to the library and armed myself with all the food books I could find. I scanned the TV for all the TV chef programmes I could find and settled down to my new way of life.

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Supporting image for story: Stick diet, I prefer to die happy!

"Too much salt and sugar is bad for you. Read the labels". I read the labels. I found a dictionary and read the labels again. I didn't understand half the words!

Did you know there is more salt in cornflakes than in crisps? Neither did I.

I discarded all my tinned and packaged foods. Buy fresh and buy organic. That's the ticket.

"Branded bottled sauces are artificial. Make your own". I threw all my bottles away and made fresh mayonnaise, salad cream, and tomato sauce. They didn't look like the bottled sauces and certainly didn't taste like them. I threw it all away and retrieved the bottles.

"Buy fresh organic food". My shopping bill doubled. Still I convinced myself that it tasted better. Until my sister-in-law gave me a bag of fresh veg straight from her garden. Her food made the organic food from the supermarket taste like plastic. I went back to buying normal fresh food.

"Make your own fruit juice". This was successful, but expensive. I do this on special occasions only.

Smoothies? Too expensive. Salads? Too boring after a fortnight, and I was growing long ears.

So I've told my doctor where he can stick his healthy eating. If I'm going to die I'm going to die happy.

Jim Wood, Holmer Lake

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