Divorce can be complicated enough, but when children are involved the potential for disputes rises alarmingly, writes Tracey O’Sullivan

Elin Woods may be about to walk away from her marriage to champion golfer Tiger Woods with a record-breaking settlement, but the mother of two has secured a much more significant battle victory in her divorce.

The blonde beauty has included a clause that Tiger will be forbidden from introducing their children to any future girlfriends.

In fact he can only carry out such introductions should he marry again.

It may be a clause Sadie Frost is now wishing she had insisted on when splitting with actor Jude Law.

Recent reports suggested Sadie was left fuming after Law’s current girlfriend Sienna Miller took her son Rudy for a haircut chopping off all his golden curls.

Although the row was later played down it has certainly not helped to ease relations between the pair, which are said to be at Cold War status.

But Shropshire experts warned today that Sadie would be unlikely to clinch a similar deal to Elin.

In fact it would be unlikely that courts in Britain would even countenance such a demand, according to family law specialist at Hatchers Solicitors in Shrewsbury, Robert Adams.

Despite the fact that introducing new partners is a leading bone of contention for couples in Shropshire, with more and more raising the issue during divorce proceedings, it is not a request the courts look favourably on.

“It would not be countenanced over here by the courts,” added Mr Adams.

“They are only interested in what’s in the child’s best interests – not whether mum likes dad’s new partner or vice versa. It’s a constant source of aggravation but is one of life’s common and perennial problems in the relationship industry.”

“Many mothers try this but the court is not sympathetic at all. They might restrict it for a limited period but once there is an established relationship it has to be acknowledged that the partner’s new partner is an item in their life and cannot be excluded. We have several clients where this is a major issue for them.”

Sour

A Shropshire mother, who did not wish to give her name, said she had found an amicable split had suddenly turned sour once the issue of new partners and introducing them to her child had been raised.

A mother of one boy, her marriage broke down last year and the couple agreed to go their separate ways.

She has since met a new boyfriend and after several months dating wished to introduce him to her four-year-old son.

“I informed my former partner before I even considered introducing them that it was something I wanted to do. He took it to mean I was asking permission but that wasn’t what I was doing. I wanted him to have the opportunity to meet this new man in my life if he wished to do so before I introduced him to my son and to ask any questions he wanted to ask.

“Unfortunately what had been, until that point, an amicable split became very tense and argumentative with a number of rows about what I wanted to do.

“He did things like look him up on social networking sites to find out more information and would then grill me about various aspects of it. He wasn’t happy about my decision and I suppose when I thought about it I realised I would also have found it difficult.

“However, life moves on and if parents can’t make it work together they have to accept that there will eventually be a situation where one or both parents wish to introduce a new partner. I considered it all very carefully and how it would work, and I wanted my son’s father to be a part of it. Luckily we eventually did reach a compromise but only with the help of mediation as we simply couldn’t agree on a way forward on our own.

“The solution is still far from perfect but I do hope we can eventually get to a place where we all can be friends for the sake of the children. It is probably easier when both parties move on and have an equal stake in supporting the introduction of new partners.

“I would never expect a parent to be happy if they were not consulted on the introduction and I would totally expect them to take an interest in the new partner, but not to the extent of jumping to all sorts of conclusions and making the situation volatile. I didn’t need my ex-husband’s permission to introduce my son to my boyfriend but I did want him to feel as comfortable as possible with my decision.”

But Mr Adams warned that while parents in the UK who have been given parental responsibility for their child would struggle to dictate to a former partner who he or she could introduce to their children, they could have a case if an ex allowed a girlfriend or boyfriend to take their child for a haircut.

“The haircut thing is slightly different — that is a specific issue problem,” he added. “Things like hair, make-up, nails and tattoos are all issues about parental responsibility and when it affects the child’s appearance and may involve a technical assault in doing it that is a different matter.

“A partner authorising another to cut a child’s hair may constitute an assault on the child as the child does not have capacity to give consent and neither does the partner as they have no parental rights per se.”

So Sadie may have a case against Miss Miller.