Making friends through social networking sites isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, according to many Shropshire users. Rebecca Lawrence reports

Facebook has completely taken off as the social networking site, with many youngsters now organising their entire life through the website.

People put up all sorts of photos of themselves, from holidays to nights out on the town, and then there’s “the wall” where you can leave comments and also constantly update your status to tell people what you are doing.

According to a recent poll, almost half of all under-21s and one in five 22-30-year-olds have given a partner the boot via sites such as Facebook and Twitter during the past 12 months.

Some are even discovering their marriages are over by logging onto the net.

The survey also found that everyone loves a bit of cyber-spying, with almost everyone who was polled admitting to checking out a former partner’s new girlfriend or boyfriend by looking them up on Facebook or MySpace.

And another survey suggests one in two people in the UK has ‘stalked’ a former partner as well as people they dislike online.

Facebook launched in 2004 and has risen to dominate the social networking world – it far out raced Friends Reunited – the original way to get in touch with old friends.

This week one of its big strengths was highlighted by the creation of two memorial pages for tragic Shropshire student Aiden Brookes, who was killed in the Bridgnorth cave collapse on Monday.

But experts warn people must be wary about Facebook and not write every detail of their entire lives on it, as it can be dangerous.

For example, you can’t really control what people post about you – if someone wrote a nasty comment or wanted to write something malicious, it would pop up on people’s home pages.

Yes, there are security settings, and as a Facebook user myself, I have mine at the highest setting so people cannot even find me unless I want them to – but it wouldn’t stop people I am already ‘friends’ with being able to post what they wanted.

Some people post all sorts of personal information on their profile pages, including phone numbers and addresses.

Lucinda Poole, 27, of Shrewsbury, admits that although she has about 120 friends on her Facebook page, only about five of those are ‘real’ friends she speaks to every week.

She says: “I think it’s nice to touch base with people though and remember them – like people you knew as a child. But it can be voyeuristic. People want to know who has gained weight, who has got married and if they have a nice house so it’s very much like that.

“Some people have every thought and feeling on their status page and I think that’s attention seeking and they want people to ask what’s wrong. I don’t know anyone who has been dumped by Facebook but I know a lot of people who have been dumped that write about their feelings on their status and it is very public,” Lucinda says.

Sue Hedges of Telford, who formed the website Moan About Men with her friend Angie Savchenko, also feels there can be dangers to the Facebook phenomenon.

The pair have set up an internet group through Facebook, which runs with their website to get one million women moaning about men.

Sue says she also has a personal Facebook page but thinks it can be addictive for some people.

“Our members use Facebook and often have conversations about it. I have never found anyone who has found out anything bad on Facebook though.

“But my friend nearly got caught out as you cannot keep anything secret. She was having an affair and someone sent her a rose and it came up on my Facebook page she had received a rose and it turned out she was seeing someone else.

“Our members read each others’ statuses and ask why someone is feeling fed up or angry – mainly it is just everyday things.

“I think people become addicted to Facebook and they will go on it all the time and even write they are doing the cooking but I think writing ‘Sue is doing the cooking’ is a bit odd.”

Sue admits her husband thinks the whole concept is very strange.

“He does not have an account and I will say something about his friends and he will say ‘How do you know that?’ and he just does not get it,” she says.

Annie Bennett, a counsellor therapist based in London, believes that where using social networking sites such as Facebook is concerned, there are both advantages and disadvantages.

“It’s positive that people connect with friends or acquaintances who they would not usually have time to keep in touch with.

“For instance it can be a useful way of informing people about plans and a way to express yourself to many people about your views and beliefs.”

There is, however, a downside, says Annie.

“But if a social networking platform is used to shamelessly expose intimate details of a relationship then it is clearly not being used appropriately. More importantly, the person who chooses to function this way is not addressing their own important communication and feeling skills,” she says.