It never happens to Jack Bauer, writes our News Blogger David Burrows.

You never see CTU’s finest crouching behind a rock outside a terrorist hideout, ready to launch a one-man attack, phoning headquarters and asking Chloe to upload a satellite image to his hand-held only to be told: “Hold on a sec, Jack. My screen’s just crashed. It’s just rebooting.

“Yes, Jack, I’m sure the terrorists are closing in, but I can only go as fast as the computer lets me. What’s that shooting noise, Jack? Jack…?”

Here, however, the yelling and expletives that accompany a computer crash are so regular that if we had a swearbox there would possibly be no need for a Make Poverty History campaign.

The little bomb symbol that appears on our screens causes more trouble than any dirty bomb ever did for Keifer Sutherland.

Still, occasionally the computer tries to help.

Just this morning my colleague had the message: “Error -5019”. So although her computer wouldn’t work, at least she knew why.

“-5019? Oh no, that’s really hard to resolve! If only it had been Error -5018. That would have been simple to sort out.”

It’s not like we have a guide book to tell us what these numbers mean. “Error -5019 . . . tiny squirrel has built its nest in your hard drive. Please refer to supplier.”

Of course the answer to all these errors is simple. The mantra of technical support departments the world over: “Have you tried turning it off and turning it back on again?”

• David Burrows is the Shropshire Star’s National News Editor.
• You can comment on his blog in the box below.