Blog: So, according to a Which? survey, it turns out shopkeepers have been secretly adding a few extra inches to measurements allowed for standard dress sizes, increasing bust and hip measurements just enough to allow us to squeeze our well-fed behinds into the size we’d like to believe we are.

Vanity sizing is just the latest trick in retail’s repertoire aimed at encouraging us to shell out for those size 10s in a fit of flattery. Whilst I can’t deny the euphoric thrill of zipping up a size 10 when I know I’m really a 12, there is a flip side – imagine the desolation on bursting out of that size 12, now that you know it’s really a 14 but the store was trying to make you feel better!

Apparently, nine out of 10 women find buying clothes a time-consuming lottery, having no idea what size to pick off the rail with such massive sizing variations across High Street fashion chains.

I do have sympathy for those nine out of 10 women, but at least they are dealing with standard sizes to start with. If anyone wants to find out what a time-consuming clothes buying lottery really looks like, they should come shopping with me, or any one of the many others out there who weren’t fortunate enough to get a standard body to start with.

At this moment I am wearing a top featuring an unusually large neckline, to accommodate the hard collar I’m wearing to support my spine. Over that I have on the only sweat top I could find with a zip because I can’t manage the over-the-head variety any more – but even then I’ve had to attach some dangly bits to the zip to give my weak and wibbly hands enough grip to pull it up.

I’m wearing loose trousers with an elasticated waistband so I don’t have to struggle with more buttons and zips, but having had more surgery on one leg than the other, I’ve ended up with one size 10 leg and one size 12. This means whichever trousers I wear spend the entire day twisting round to the size 10 side and I spend the entire day, hauling them back again.

And don’t even get me on to shoes!

Having studied at the Imelda Marcos School of Shoe Buying, I’ve now been reduced to two – yes, that’s just two – pairs of orthotic-friendly, bunion-accommodating flatties after my impressive collection of killer-heels suffered a traumatic and premature retirement. And even then I have to buy two different sizes and wear one of each as my poor old feet no longer match either.

There must be millions like me, who dream of picking up off-the-peg fashion fabulousness, but instead have to mount a full-on, meticulous clothes-buying operation just to find a coat they can do up – let alone look good in – so forgive me for not launching an immediate ‘one-size-one-measurement’ campaign.

Take my advice and next time you fit into a size smaller than normal, give yourself a pat on the back, enjoy the moment and throw the Which? survey to the wind!

By Emma Suddaby