At the sound of the tone . . .

Shrewsbury woman Fiona Hankin has made it on to a shortlist of 15 people to be the new voice of the speaking clock. We were chatting about this in the office, and I got to thinking about how wrong for the job some of my colleagues would be.

A photographer I worked with for many years would certainly be out. I don’t think anyone wanting to know if they’re running late needs to hear: “At the @*%! sound of the @*%! tone the @*%! time will be two o’@*%! clock precisely. Alright!?”

Another reporter I work with speaks so fast, the listener would probably hear something like: “thetimeattthesoundofthebeepwillbethreethirtythreeandthirtythreeseconds.”

Then there’s a cleaner in one office who isn’t the clearest speaker ever. “Mpphhrthgrplmfffrgdrtbnttghh”. Something like that.

And after the day I’ve had, anyone calling for the time would probably be greeted with: “WHAT!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!”